Category - Relationships

Fresh updates and insights

AITAH for leaving my own birthday dinner early after my boyfriend showed up with three of his friends uninvited?

I (26F) planned a small birthday dinner at one of my favorite restaurants just five of my closest friends and my boyfriend (28M). I reserved the table, I wanted it to be a chill, intimate night with the people who matter most to me. When my boyfriend arrived he brought three of his friends that I barely know. No warning. No ": Hey, do you mind?" Just a casual "They didn’t have plans, figured it’d be fun." It completely changed the vibe. The restaurant had to rearrange the table and suddenly this dinner I planned turned into him holding court with his buddies. They dominated the conversation with inside jokes, barely acknowledged my friends. I felt like an extra at my own event. I tried to stay polite, but I was honestly upset. After about an hour of feeling invisible, I pulled the server aside, paid the entire bill including for his friends told everyone I wasn’t feeling well, said a warm goodbye to my friends and left. Later that night, my boyfriend texted saying I was dramatic and made him "look bad" in front of his friends. He said I should’ve just gone with the flow and that I ruined the night for everyone. I didn’t yell, I didn’t cause a scene. But now he’s acting like I was out of line.

2025-10-15 13:59:40

Elise Dubois

Relationships

AITA for reporting threats made by my husband's kids and their mom to CPS and then leaving because I'm pregnant?

I (30f) have been married for the last two years and together with my husband (33m) for a little over 4.5 years. He's divorced with two children (11 and 13) with his ex. I was not the other woman. They were not married when I met him and had been divorced for at least 3 years by that point. But the ex was very difficult once I moved in with my husband. It was something that could be managed by reducing contact back then but she made it clear she didn't want her kids to have a stepmom and she did voice to the kids that she did not want them to like or respect me. It didn't work right away and we got along well at the start but a few weeks after the wedding there was a very clear change in the relationship. It wasn't unmanageable and we went to therapy together to try and make things work well like they had previously. Things changed for the worst when I became pregnant. We told the kids and they became angry. They told their mom and she became angry. And then the kids were aggressive in speaking to me. There was a lot of fuck you and fuck off and get the fuck out of here from them. I was called names. I was told to get an abortion by the 13 year old. My husband was speaking to his kids and punishing them when needed. But it got worse. And then the kids showed me texts between them and their mom where there were threats to me and my unborn child. Which turned into them threatening to make sure I didn't give birth. They were serious enough that I had to call my husband home from work early because the kids were acting like they might just follow through. He disciplined them and he told me that I shouldn't worry because they won't really do it. I told him I wasn't sure about that and he told me he wouldn't let anything happen. But it almost did. The 11 year old attempted to make the threats a reality. I told my husband I was not putting myself or our baby at risk. He told me it wouldn't happen again and he'd be dealing with it all around but he had no answer as to what he could do. Not even to say the kids would never be left with just me and then more threats came as we were fighting about it. I told him I was not taking chances with my baby. I made a report to CPS and then I moved out of the house I share with my husband and in with my parents. This is all very recent but the CPS investigation is taking this seriously from what I can tell. My husband has reached out to me and he expressed how hurt and angry he was that I took it this far. His parents have also done the same. They told me I took it too far and I could have worked with my husband to make this safer for me. I feel like I gave it a chance but he was far too blasé about it especially after the attempt. But maybe I'm overreacting and I'm here to be told if that's true or not. I only want to keep my baby safe.

2025-10-15 13:59:35

Anya Petrova

Relationships

AITA for telling my BIL that someone is going to punch his girlfriend one day?

My older sister recently got married to her long-time fiance. They are polyamorous and both have a separate partner each. I have met my sisters boyfriend a few times at holiday events and he was really nice. My brother-in-law's girlfriend (we'll call her Sally) I've met once before at their engagement party and she seemed nice but she also seemed like the type of person who wants to be the center of attention. She talked over everyone, insisted on helping my sister open any gifts they received and she even told people that "she's the reason" my sister and my BIL were getting married because she's officiating the wedding. It all rubbed me the wrong way, but as long as my sister and BIL were cool with it, who was I to say anything? Things did get a little weird towards the end of the party, however, because Sally got pretty drunk and started very loudly proclaiming how monogamy was ruining relationships and was disgusting. That the only reason people aren't open with their love is because they are scared, insecure, jealous, and controlling. This made most of the people left at the party visably uncomfortable and most left soon after because she wouldn't stop (even after my BIL took her aside and told her to calm down). I was helping my sister clean up from the party when Sally started questioning me about my stance (my boyfriend had to work so he wasnt at the party). My sister tried to squash the discussion but Sally ignored her and asked again. I very calmy explained that I tried polyamory once and quickly realized it wasn't for me and that I was now in a very happy monogamous relationship but totally support non-monogamous relationships. Sally started to say something but my sister very firmly told her that she was drunk and to go lay down. She rolled her eyes but did stomp back to the bedroom. My sister then explained how Sally was usually very nice but did make being poly her whole personality, which had caused problems before. Flash forward a few weeks later to the wedding itself: everything went great! It was beautiful and everyone seemed happy. During the reception my boyfriend and I were talking to my mom and Sally approached us to say hi (shes met my mom quite a few times and my mom is the type to love everyone). My mom reintroduced me and also introduced my boyfriend. Nothing seemed off, we all said our pleasantries and that was it. A little later, my boyfriend went to get some drinks for us while I danced with my sister. It was taking him longer than I expected, so I went to go looking for him. To my suprise, he was being cornered by Sally near the drink table. His back was literally to the wall and everytime he took a step away from her, she would step closer. She was also rubbing his arm in a flirty way. I couldn't hear what she was saying to him, but the relief on his face when he saw me told me everything I needed to know. The only thing I did hear was her whining, "oh, come on." I walked up and grabbed my drink from his hand, which finally made her take a few steps back. I asked what they were talking about and she very bluntly and flirtatiously replied, "I was just telling him how much I love gingers." (My boyfriend, obviously, is a ginger). I simply told her, as calmly as I could, to stop being a fucking cunt and there were plenty of single people at the wedding she could hit on. She said something back but I was already pulling my boyfriend away and didn't hear nor care. The rest of the night was uneventful other than normal wedding fun. A few days later, my BIL texted me to say I needed to apologize to Sally because flirting with people is part of her personality, and she didn't do anything wrong. I told him that one day she's going to come across someone less nice than me and she's going to get her shit rocked. My BIL thinks I'm being petty and an asshole, my sister and mom think I was justified and that Sally was being disrespectful.

2025-10-15 13:59:29

Clara Jensen

Relationships

AITA for leaving my boyfriend’s office Christmas party after he repeatedly humiliated me in front of his coworkers?

This happened last weekend and I can’t stop thinking about it. My boyfriend (30M) invited me (28F) to his company’s Christmas dinner and I was excited but also nervous. I wanted to make a good impression so I spent a lot of time picking the perfect outfit, doing my hair, and ensuring I was presentable. When we arrived everything seemed fine at first. I introduced myself to his coworkers and they were polite if not a little stiff. As the night went on though things took a turn. During dinner my boyfriend made a joke about my job. I’m an event planner and he works in corporate finance. He said something like “She just plans parties for a living while I’m out here making real money.” People laughed but I felt a lump in my throat. I work hard and I’m proud of what I do so hearing him belittle me like that stung. I tried to laugh it off to keep things light but then he doubled down. Someone asked me about my favorite event I’d planned and before I could answer he interrupted saying “Probably one of those kids’ birthday parties. That’s her level of expertise.” Everyone laughed again and I just sat there mortified. The final straw came during dessert when people were sharing funny stories. He decided to tell an embarrassing story about me that I’ve explicitly asked him not to share before. It’s a personal story from early in our relationship involving a mishap I had while meeting his parents. I was practically begging him with my eyes to stop but he told the story anyway. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Everyone was laughing, and I wanted to disappear. I quietly told him I wasn’t okay with what he was doing but he brushed me off, saying “Don’t be so uptight—it’s all in good fun.” At that point I couldn’t take it anymore. I excused myself thanked the host and left. When he got home he was furious accusing me of embarrassing him by leaving. He said I made him look bad in front of his coworkers and that I was being overly sensitive. Now he’s refusing to apologize and insists I owe him an apology for “overreacting.” My friends are split some say I should’ve stayed and dealt with it later while others think he crossed the line. So, AITA for walking out?

2025-10-30 08:06:40

Clara Jensen

Relationships

AITA for kicking out my girlfriend

So I have a cat named Raven who's 3 years old. My girlfriend of 2 years moved in with me a few weeks ago and it was clear she didn't like my cat. I didn't think it was really a big deal until one day I got home and he was just gone. He's not an outdoor cat and he never goes outside. He was gone for hours and I was worried sick until my buddy came to my house and returned him, saying he found him 2 blocks from my house. I asked my girlfriend how my cat, who has never tried to go out before ended up that far from my house and she admitted to kicking him out. I was furious, saying she had no right to kick him out and told her that since she thought she had the power to kick my cat out, I wanted her out of my house by the end of the month. She cried that she had nowhere to go and that she would have to live on the streets. I said I didn't care and told her to leave by the end of the month. My friends think I'm being too harsh, but my cat could have died because of her and I don't want her trying anything else. AITA?

2025-11-08 16:10:56

Luca Moretti

Family

AITA for kicking out my dad and his pregnant wife out of the home I legally own after they sent my depressed sister to live with our aunt?

My mother passed away 3 years ago. The family home, where I and my sister grew up, was willed to me. It was her ancestral property, and she wanted her daughter to have it. The other vacation home went to my 16 year old sister. Our father remarried 6 months after mom passed away and moved his new wife in. My sister says that that woman has removed all of our family pictures from the main living area. She has removed our mom's pictures as well. Now all of these pictures adorn the walls of my sister's room. Recently our father and his wife announced that they were pregnant with twins. My sister didn't take it well. She's still not over mom's death and had a breakdown after the announcement. The night of my sister's 16th birthday party, she brought a lot of friends over and the party went on till the next morning. My dad's wife, who was out with our father on vacation returned the same morning and lost her cool when she saw the kids passed out on the living room. Our dad knew about the party, they just got home earlier than expected. His wife proceeded to lose her cool and had a big shouting match with my sister. She said that my sister was just like our mom and was a burden on our dad. She then asked her to leave and sent her packing to our aunt's. I was furious when I got to know about it. I showed up home the next day and asked them to leave within a week. She's 7 months pregnant and had no idea that the house belonged to me. I know I shouldn't be kicking a pregnant woman out but I don't want my spineless father and his wife to abuse my sister anymore. My father called me a cruel brat and now wants to challenge our mom's will. He can try, my mom's family has already appointed their family lawyer to fight my case. AITA?

2025-11-08 16:25:18

Luca Moretti

Relationships

AITAH: I am calling off my engagement after my partner revealed he is MAGA.

My fiancé and I have been together since 2013 when we met in college. He struggled to get a well paying job and during his long bouts of unemployment must have been radicalized to blame everyone else I chalked it up to depression and tried to get him help with therapy. I paid for him to return to school to become a nurse too but he still has not completed the pre request after 7 years!He currently works gig jobs while I am a nurse in California making close to 400k a year working a full time and a part time job. I was hoping to save up enough to not have to work after having a baby since I one I cannot rely on him. We were planned to get married next year and wanted to try for a baby. He knows I am very liberal and all about women’s rights. He never openly expressed support for MAGA itself until after Trump won and said Trump will help the economy and finally allow him to get a good job I told him that it was the easiest time to get a job in the past 20 years in 2021 yet he couldn’t. I am not giving into sunken costs and staying and he didn’t know, but he did make offhand comments before on women losing their worth the older they get and I questioned him and he said it was a joke. The past week has been miserable listening to him talk non stop on how great trump is and how he will turn everting great again. I had it and gave him notice to leave by the end of the month and we are through. He said it’s unfair and told me it’s stupid to give up on us over just politics. The very fact he said that solidified the notion that he is so clueless and our values are too different. He will likely have to move back into his parent’s home or be homeless since he makes less than 35k a year in the most expensive region in the USA. Am I the asshole for throwing away my relationship of 11 years over politics? I wish politics was boring again.

2025-10-27 18:22:06

Clara Jensen

Relationships

AITA for telling my husband he “should have just married a white woman”

For context I’m a black woman and my husband is white. I have 4c hair and I wrap my hair in a satin scarf to go to bed. For those of you who don’t know what that means, basically my hair curl pattern is really tightly coiled so my hair texture is kinky and easily tangled and easily breakable if not taken care of well. I used to sleep on a satin pillowcase when my hair was shorter and had a lower chance of tangling while I tossed and turned in my sleep. But recently I’ve added oils to my nightly routine and since my hair is a bit pass my shoulders now, the chances of it tangling are higher and I don’t want my pillowcases to get soaked with oils so I started wrapping my hair up again. First night I wore it my husband said that I looked like a slave which- ok was a little bit funny and a little bit true in my scarf and nightgown combo so I let him have that one. But since then, it’s the little comments when I get into bed. Like “are we doing the slave tonight?” Or “should I help you into bed grandma?” Little things like that. I’ve explained why l do it, and I think he understands that but he simply doesn’t like it and my hope was that he’d get used to it by now. Last night I was getting ready for bed and I couldn’t find my scarf anywhere so I asked DH if he’d seen it and he admitted that the hid it but wouldn’t tell me where. He wouldn’t stop joking around even when I got visibly upset and said he wished he could run his fingers through my hair or something along those lines and I snapped and said if he wanted that he should have married a white woman. He got really quiet after that and told me where he hid it. We haven’t talked much about it but there’s this air of awkwardness. The only times he mentioned it was this morning when he said that we should look into counseling for our “race issues” and that I made him feel really racist and I didn’t think about it that way. I thought he was upset because I yelled at him but I didn’t think it was the statement itself (granted I probably should not have brought race into it but I wanted to illustrate a point.) Now he’s suggesting couples counseling to get through our “race issues”? I don’t think it was that serious and I don’t want to go through all that. AITA?

2025-11-08 16:25:20

Jonas Bergström

Relationships

AITAH for letting my chronically late wife miss an event she was looking forward to by not rushing her, because I wanted her to face consequences?

My wife (32F) and I (31M) have been together for 5 years. I’m fed up with my wife’s chronic lateness to many things. It’s really annoying and grates on my nerves. To her, it seems like no big deal because I always manage to rush her by telling her the time of an event 45 minutes earlier. She’s never noticed EARLIER because she’s too caught up with herself, constantly taking photos. That’s the reason she’s always late. She has a decent following on Instagram and is looking to grow as a “content creator.” I find it really silly how she turns everything we do into a photo session, and at this point, I’ve stopped agreeing to take her photos altogether. We’ve had several conversations about this. I’ve told her that it’s mentally exhausting for me to always have to stay on top of making sure we both get ready according to plan. But she never really does anything to address it. This time, I wanted her to experience the consequences of her actions. This month alone, we’ve been embarrassingly late to events 2 times, and this time was the first she realized I hadn’t been honest about the timing because I used to give her an ETA 40 minutes earlier. A week ago, I told her I wouldn’t be doing that anymore and that I expected her to act like an adult and be more responsible. It was her birthday this weekend, and I got her tickets to an event featuring several performers, including her favorite artists in the first act. This time, as I’d already told her before, I didn’t give her the extra 40-minute buffer. I expected her to remember our conversation and store that information in her head to plan accordingly. Instead, she did her whole influencer routine—decorating our room, setting up studio lights, dressing up, and taking photos. The whole time, I knew she was missing out on her favorite artist because she didn’t take me seriously. It was so ironic that I didn’t even feel like reminding her. I’m done with the mental burden of always rushing and planning. We arrived, and she realized what had happened. She got upset and started crying, asking how I could do this to her on her birthday. She said it seemed like I was liking the rise it got from her and asked why I couldn’t set my “ego” aside for one day. I told her this was on her, I’d already made it clear I wasn’t going to rush anymore, and she should have listened the first time and expected me to follow through, unlike her. She said the whole point of the event was to see the performances of those artists, who we’d just missed. She was incredibly upset and kept crying off and on during the event. The ride home was awkward. I was in the downstairs restroom when she texted me saying I wasn’t welcome in the bedroom that night. I ignored her message and went in while she was changing. She looked like she wanted to kill me, and I simply told her that her saying I’m not welcome was irrelevant because it’s my room too. If she’s uncomfortable, she could take the couch. She ended up leaving to visit her mom, and I’m considering whether I was an asshole?

2025-10-30 08:06:32

Jonas Bergström

Relationships

AITAH for being mad at my husband for saying he would pick his deceased wife over me?

My (34F) husband (37M) was married once before me. She was his high school sweetheart. They started dating their junior year, survived long distance during college, and got married when they were both 23 very shortly after graduating college. She passed away unexpectedly at age 26 from an aneurism and it obviously devastated him, especially because they were extremely young. They never had children. He contemplated remarrying because he was so heartbroken, but we ended up meeting about four years after that. We got married when I was 31 and he was 34 and have two children. The other day, we were at a friend potluck gathering. Everything was going well until one of our friends brought up a new topic that had to do with relationships. She is newly divorced, so it was about her divorce. Others were chiming in with past relationships from high school, college, etc. I had said I never thought I would get married because my luck with men has always been terrible until I met my husband and I said I felt very lucky to have met him. After a little while longer, my husband brings up his deceased wife. Everyone knows he was married before me and that she passed. He was talking about her and then drops a bomb and goes “If she walked through that front door right now, I’d pick up where we left off” If I am being honest, it felt like someone put my heart into a blender and punched me in the gut as hard as they could. Everyone in the room could sense the awkwardness that followed. To avoid making a scene, I just laughed it off even though I think it was still obvious that it hurt me. I just felt that if you still felt that way, then why are we married? I’ve never asked him to get over his wife. I have never had a deceased spouse or even a deceased partner, so I am unsure how that feels. But I would never SAY that in front of my new spouse. After the gathering, we left and I did not speak to him the entire car ride home or barely the entire night. I did tell him that what he said hurt my feelings deeply and that we could talk in the morning once I’ve calmed down because I didn’t want to say something mean to him. I ended up sleeping on the couch because he would not leave me alone. It’s now the next morning and I barely slept. He is still sleeping. I’m not really sure what to say or what he will say

2025-10-30 08:06:45

Luca Moretti

Relationships

AITA for getting up from my chair in the middle of christmas dinner and shouting "SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT MY BODYYYYY" in response to my husband's observation?

So, Ever since I had my son months ago, my husband has started making indirect comments about my body. He never says any hurtful words but I find his "observations" he calls it hurtful. For example, he'd see me wearing an old top and say "oh that top used to look good on you but not anymore though..." or when he looks at my waist and says "Wow, didn't know your waist could get this wide!". Basically passive stuff that I tried to ignore til it extended to friends and family. FYI this went on for months and months and months!! We went to christmas celebration at his family's home. My SIL complimented my floral maxi dress and my husband said "I agree it looks nice on you...though I have to admit that your waist could get smaller than this!". Awkward silence took over. I was absolutely fuming and this was my last straw. So I got up from my chair in the middle of dinner and shouted at the top of my lungs "SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT MY BODDDYYY!!!!". He was absolutely speechless as his family stared while some others tried to get me to calm down but situation got more tense and dinner ended up being cut short and my husband storming off to his friend's place to spend the night upon leaving a very nasty text saying I embarrassed him and made a scene over an "observation" he made. He called me childish and told me to get therapy for my insecurities instead of verbally abusing him and scaring his family. Now I feel like an absolute idiot asshole and like I ruined christmas for him and everybody with my over sensitivity. AITA??

2025-11-08 16:10:19

Clara Jensen

Relationships

AITAH for walking out of my own birthday dinner because my girlfriend turned it into her celebration?

So my (25M) birthday was last weekend. I don’t usually do anything big, but this year a bunch of my friends were in town, and my girlfriend (23F) offered to plan something. I was genuinely excited. She made a dinner reservation at a nice place I’ve been wanting to try and said she had a little surprise planned. The surprise was that she invited a bunch of her friends. Like, 6 of them. People I barely know. One of them I actively dislike because she used to hit on me when my girlfriend and I first started dating. My girlfriend brushed it off saying it would make things more fun and lively. Whatever. I tried to roll with it. But then at the dinner, it just got worse. She spent the entire time talking to her friends. I was seated at the far end of the table next to two people I’d never met. She didn’t even sit next to me. When the food came, they all toasted her for organising everything and started talking about her upcoming promotion. Her best friend gave a speech about how she deserves all the happiness in the world. Not one mention of me or my birthday. No cake, no toast, no happy birthday. Nothing. I literally just sat there while everyone gushed over her for two hours. Eventually I got up, paid for my portion of the meal, said I wasn’t feeling well, and left. I didn’t make a scene or yell. I just quietly left. Later she texted me saying I embarrassed her in front of her friends and ruined the night. She said she tried really hard to make it special and I was being ungrateful. A few of her friends have messaged me saying I was being immature and that it wasn’t that deep. But I don’t know, man. Is it crazy to think my birthday should’ve been at least a little about me? AITAH?

2025-10-30 08:06:22

Anya Petrova

Relationships

AITA for telling my mom she can't share a room or a bed with her boyfriend in my home?

When I (27f) was in college I met my boyfriend and we moved in together, sharing a place with some friends, after dating for a year. I was 19 when we met and 20 when we moved in together. We decided from that point onward to take turns spending Christmas with our families. But the first year we were supposed to see mine, my mom made it clear my boyfriend could not stay and and we weren't sharing a room or a bed in her house. My dad argued in favor of letting it happen since I was an adult and living with him already but mom said no. She hated that I wouldn't stay at their house then and instead booked an Airbnb. She said I should respect the rules of her house and I told her I was, but I didn't want to tell my boyfriend to be alone on the holidays and especially when his family had welcomed us together happily. After that I made it clear there would be no coming to visit like that if I couldn't sleep with my boyfriend. My mom said it wasn't like we were married so she had every right to that rule. Two years ago my dad died and for 11 months my mom has been in a relationship with her boyfriend. They don't live together exactly but according to my brother he was there most nights while he was still there. My mom and brother aren't really talking right now. My brother could hear mom and her boyfriend in bed and he hated it so he moved out. He's also 22 and had wanted to but it gave him the push to move. My mom was furious and demanded to know why he was leaving out of nowhere and she freaked when my brother told her he was tired of hearing them. It started mom off on him not being happy for her that she found someone again after dad died. My mom seems to be missing my brother being around and she told me she misses having her kids around her so she wanted to visit for a week or two soon. She wanted to bring her boyfriend along and I told her she can't share a room or a bed with him in my home. I told her I do not want to hear that. She got mad at me and said she's a grown woman and should be allowed her freedom. I told her she was alright denying it to me and I wasn't even planning to have sex in her house. But it sounded like she doesn't care if we hear or not and I'm not dealing with it. I also told her I wasn't going to reward her with sharing with her boyfriend when she has been so strict with me about it. My mom accused me of acting like a petty child. AITA?

2025-10-30 08:06:45

Jonas Bergström

Relationships

Update: I told my wife that my life would be better without her. She went nuclear, so I responded in kind.

Two weeks ago, I had an argument with my wife, Anne. This argument stemmed from Anne's incessant need to contradict me and everything I say. Anne left in a fit of rage to stay with her parents, and then kept spamming me with texts demanding an apology. A few days after Anne left, I felt something I hadn't in a long time at home: peace. I didn't have someone nagging me about literally everything I did. I didn't have to eat my meals in the "correct" order (something about pH balance that she probably saw from some brainrot creator on TikTok). I didn't have to wash my feet after getting home. I could actually enjoy myself, which is impossible when Anne is around because I found many years ago that she tends to get the most aggressive when I seem like I'm either in a very good or very bad mood. I then did something I never thought I'd do: I reached out to her ex. He was more than eager to talk about Anne and her shenanigans, so we met up for drinks. He and I both had near-identical experiences with her. Anne is, through and through, a pretty horrible person, especially to her romantic partners. He cited irreconcilable differences for divorcing her, where it was no specific event, but just a long list of terrible interactions and coming to the realization that he detested her as a person. During this time, Anne went silent on me. I used this lull in our relationship to visit a lawyer, who told me that due to the nature of laws in our state and the fact that Anne is able-bodied and educated, the chances of me ever having to pay alimony are basically zero. I called Anne at that point. She, for some reason, still expected an apology. I told her that I wanted a divorce. She threatened to "take everything" from me. I said she could try, but any further contact should be done through my lawyer. I'm fully happy to split our assets fairly. I'm fairly sure that Anne will agree to any deal that gives her more than half (it's just the way she is), and if it's a 55/45 split, I don't care. All I'll have to do is act like she got the better of me, and since she's an idiot, she'll happily agree. Thanks to everyone who responded in the last post with advice. Tons of you suggested divorce, which I think was what actually got me to consider it seriously.

2025-11-08 16:29:06

Jonas Bergström

Family

AITA For my reaction when my 30yo fiancè exchanged his gift with my 16yo brother?.

I F26 been with my fiancè for 3 years. We both work and we both share rent and other expenses. But My fiancè is currently looking for a new job. He lost his old job 3 months ago. My family lives 30min away and although it's been difficult this year I decided to get my brother (who has a chronic condition and struggled a lot lately and was in the hospital for a few days for anemia) the one thing he's been wanting for some time. I got him an Xbox that cost me 300$. He was so happy and I'm glad I was able to cheer him up during those times. My fiancè received a few gifts from his family. But he wasn't happy with any of them. I got him a perfume and he liked it. We were visiting my family and we had dinner with them. My fiancè looked at the Xbox I got for my brother and didn't stop talking about it. My parents noticed, I told him to stop complaining about what he got/didn't get this year. That made them uncomfortable especially since they've been dealing with my brother's health issues and needed to relax. We got home and my fiancè took something from the closet and left for about an hour. I was asleep when he came back. In the morning I was surprised to find my brother's Xbox in the closet. I woke him and asked him about it. Turned out He dropped me off drove back to my family's house and exchanged the gift his aunt gave him (a 14$ fancy pen) with my brother's xbox. He said that my brother was happy to exchange gifts. I was so mad I told him this wasn't for him and he basically took something that is not his. Not to mention a pen for an Xbox, that's ridiculous. He told me that maybe I shouldn't have spent 300 while trying to pay for rent. I told him as long as I can pay rent that's not a problem. And that he needs to find a job if he thinks my money isn't enough. I called my mom and I found out that they didn't actually exchange gifts. My fiancè pressured my brother into giving him his Xbox. I was livid and so mad I told him to take the Xbox back to my brother but he said it was between him and my brother but I insisted. He refused so I ended up taking it myself. My fiancè argued when I took it and said that I was pressuring him and treating him poorly and have no respect for his feelings. I told him he was wrong to make my brother give him his gift and causing him stress and ruining his joy. I apologized to my brother and my parents and I felt awful because of how my fiancè behaved. My fiancè isn't talking to me saying that I have no consideration for his feelings and not understanding how he feels not having money to buy himself the things he likes. I'm surprised because he has never done anything like this before. I get that he's struggling with finding a job but this is not an excuse.

2025-11-08 16:30:45

Luca Moretti

Family

AITA for not sticking up for my grandmother after my wife told her to f- off out of her hospital room?

About 3 weeks ago my Wife-33 went into premature labor with our daughter at 31 weeks. It was entirely unexpected and both my wife and our daughter had a horrible time and it became quite dangerous for the both of them. My wife became preeclamptic among other serious complications and for the first week we weren't even sure if either my wife or our daughter would make it. Luckily they both survived but our daughter is still in the nicu after 3 weeks and probably will be in for another 3, and my wife is still in the hospital as well. It has been a horrible struggle for my wife. Before this she was a very healthy and active person and even during most of her pregnancy she was able to maintain a somewhat active lifestyle, but because of the trauma her body went through she is basically starting back from square one and hasn't even been able to hold our daughter yet. My wife has had a lot of struggles so far with her birth trauma and feels so confused and hurt by her experience. She told me that she feels betrayed by her own body and even in some of her weakest moments she even said she regretted getting pregnant entirely because of how much she has suffered and she is so worried she'll never be the person she was again. She feels horrible for having these feelings but I and multiple mental health professionals have been working to help and support her through this. We finally have reached a point where we can receive visitor's. Her family lives close but my family lives 3 states away and have been awaiting the chance to meet the baby and check in on my wife. My parents and grandparents flew down and I warned my family beforehand that my wife and daughter are still at very fragile stages and to be patient. When I brought them in to see my wife my grand mother immediately went and wanted to talk to her about the birth and her experience. My wife told her that it was one of the worst experiences of her life and my grandmother responded by telling her that the "worst is yet to come" and that struggling is what being a mother is about. My wife got very upset over this comment and started screaming at her to f- off and to get the f out. I had never seen my wife like this and I could tell she was feeling extremely stressed and I quickly escorted my family out. I told them it would be best if they left for now and we could talk later as not to cause even more stress on my wife. My family said they were "appalled" by my wifes behavior and me for not defending my grandmother, but at the end of the day I feel that it is my responsibility to be my wife's advocator all of the time but especially now. It has become a bit of a "tension" in my extended side of the family however, but I haven't told my wife about it because I don't want to stress her out and I plan to deal with this alone entirely. Should I apologize on my wifes behalf? If I am the AH I'll own up to it, but I don't see my wife as an AH at all.

2025-11-08 16:37:26

Clara Jensen

Relationships

AITA for telling my daughter she cannot introduce her African American boyfriend to her grandparents?

Let me just preface this by saying this: **I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO PROBLEM WITH INTERRACIAL RELATIONSHIPS.** Now that the air is clear, let me continue. My daughter (Anna) has recently started to date an African American man (Jamal). While I'm not exactly what you would refer to as "liberal", he's a nice young man and as long as my daughter is happy, I'm happy. The problem is Anna is rather naive about the community she lives in. While her friends are quite content to see a relationship like hers, more than a few tongues are wagging in the community and a few people have privately expressed their concern to me. As I said, I have no problem with mixed relationships and I've set them straight, but I am painfully aware of how these matters are viewed by certain segments of the population. My parents are planning to come and stay with us for a week and Anna expressed a desire to introduce Jamal to them now that things were getting more serious between them. I told her on no uncertain terms that this wasn't going to happen. I may have no problem with Jamal, but they *absolutely will*, and even when the relationship ends they won't forget it. They might even go as far as to cut her off entirely. Anna was extremely upset by this and implied I was a racist and more concerned with what my parents think than how she feels. As I said, I know my parents. They simply aren't okay with mixed relationships and if Anna were to bring Jamal over even as a friend, they would be furious both at her *and* me. Anna is currently staying with Jamal and doesn't want to speak with me right now. My wife stands by me given she knows very well how my parents are (they had a problem with her for months over the *length of the skirt* she wore when I introduced her to them, for christs sake), but a close friend I confided in told me that I have behaved like an ass and that I needed to focus more on my daughter than pleasing my parents. No advice needed, but I have to know. Have I been an ass?

2025-11-08 16:11:08

Jonas Bergström

WIBTA

WIBTA if I record the audio of my neighbours having sex and play it back to them?

My neighbours are often super loud, blasting music at 2am, yelling, blaring the TV. I’ve gone round various times politely asking if they could be quieter. We have concrete walls and carpet, so for sound to get through they really have to be loud, which they are. They also periodically have loud sex, with the woman screeching. It’s actually turning me off sex. I find them insufferable. As petty revenge, I’m considering recording them having sex and playing it back to them through the walls whenever they’re loud, instead of going round to politely request they stfu at 3am. I feel they know I’m mild-mannered, and they’re taking advantage - that since I’m not a tough guy or something (I’m a young woman), they don’t care. I’m in Australia, and I’m pretty sure that kind of recording is legal here. WIBTA?

2025-11-08 16:34:37

Elise Dubois