UPDATE - AITA for throwing my kid's clothes onto the floor when they don't fold them neatly?
A mother’s love can be both fierce and flawed, tangled in the struggle between control and care. When her daughter’s clothes were tossed carelessly, it was more than just fabric thrown aside—it was a silent cry for help from a woman trapped in denial, battling a hidden torment she barely understood herself.
The reckoning came in tears and raw vulnerability, as the weight of others’ stories shattered her defenses and forced her to confront a painful truth. With courage born from love, she sought help, stepping into the light of healing and hope, determined to rebuild a bond that fear and obsession once threatened to break.
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As renowned researcher Dr. Brené Brown explains, “Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously.” This situation highlights a critical breakdown where the OP’s internal need for order (a potential manifestation of their newly diagnosed OCD) created an excessive, unloving distance between themselves and their daughter, leading to conflict. The OP exhibited intense denial initially, a common response to confronting deeply ingrained behaviors, which only subsided after facing the reality of potential alienation from their children. Seeking psychological support immediately after the incident shows a strong commitment to change, prioritizing relational health over maintaining the compulsive routine. The daughter's temporary removal from the home provided necessary space, and the subsequent family meeting demonstrated accountability, which is vital for rebuilding trust. The OP’s actions—seeking diagnosis, starting therapy, and communicating openly about needing to change—were entirely appropriate and necessary for long-term health. To handle similar situations better, the OP should continue leveraging therapy to understand the root of the control, focusing future efforts not just on stopping specific actions (like folding clothes) but on recognizing the anxiety triggers that drive the compulsive need for perfection and control in all interactions.
HERE’S HOW REDDIT BLEW UP AFTER HEARING THIS – PEOPLE COULDN’T BELIEVE IT.:
When users weighed in, they held nothing back. It’s a raw, honest look at what people really think.
The original poster experienced a significant crisis of conscience after public feedback revealed the severity of their controlling behavior, prompting intense emotional distress and fear of losing their children. This realization led the OP to actively seek professional help and commit to substantial behavioral changes to repair their family relationships.
Given the OP's successful first steps toward therapy and open communication, the core question remains: Can deep-seated, clinically diagnosed compulsive behaviors be effectively managed and overcome when the primary motivation is the preservation of crucial family bonds, or will the underlying pattern inevitably resurface?